As a response to my brave attempt at keeping tv and media at minimum, my children turned into 3 supervillians, Bedlam, Mayhem and Chaos. A trio of devious minds, with fearsome superpowers.
Bedlam, a creative force, not to be denied. A whirlwind through the kitchen, turning sellotape, cardboard, pens, boxes, into robot washine machines, viking longboats and devastation. Then paint redistributed across walls and carpets, she all but finished her portrait on the landing wall....... red and orange, colours of fire.
Mayhem, the energy of life, life that will not be withheld, life that finds a way, a way through concrete pavements. Life that fills empty spaces like entrenched perennial weeds. Armed with a sonic scream and groovy dance moves, she pirouettes through the day, oblivious to the trail of destruction behind her, an understairs toy shop here, a new fancy dress costume there, a duplo tower castle, happy land hilarity and play dough......oh the carpet sucking playdough.
And Chaos, barefaced or should I say bare-cheeked Chaos. Beware his magnetism, his addictive smile, for he will lure you to your sticky sweet doom. Voracious in appetite, devastating in charm, he can devour the contents of your cupboards in a moment. A maverick, undisciplined, untrained, he unleashes his energy and bodily fluids, openly, enthusiastically, violently. Ricocheting off the walls, he can turn any simple household object into a near deadly missile. Aim to maim, baby, aim to maim.
A trio, alike in dignity,
In fair Thornhill, where we lay our scene,
From ancient grudge break to new mutiny,
Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.
Roll on tomorrow :)
Monday 21 February 2011
Thursday 17 February 2011
Science
"This time it had been been magic. And it didn't stop being magic just because you found out how it was done."
— Terry Pratchett (The Wee Free Men (Tiffany Aching, #1))
— Terry Pratchett (The Wee Free Men (Tiffany Aching, #1))
Wednesday 16 February 2011
Sunday 13 February 2011
In my element
One reckless evening I agreed to put in for the London Moonwalk 2011. Despite lugging myself around a 13 mile course on the coast of Wales and thinking out loud that to do twice the distance was a bl**dy stupid idea, in the manner of Tony Hawkes on a drunken bet, I found myself not willing to be the one that didn't do it.
So am in training.... ha ha.
Finding it increasingly impossible to find the time to go walking regularly, i was pleased to have a whole Sunday morning time slot with which to do an 11 mile walk. I was less pleased to discover that my set time coincided with Gods schedule of heavy rain across the British Isles. Still, never one to let the weather get me down I was resolved to go anyway and planned my route along the coast.
Wishing my resolve had had the psychic foresight to predict a 2 night vomiting bug in my youngest, that would render me sleep impoverished, I set off anyway.
I soon realised at the beginning of my walk that I was an idiot. I do have a tendency to lack wisdom, most vitally when it comes to planning and general common sense. My usual half empty attitude seems to disappear in a surge of over optimistic confidence at the prospect of an adventure. As I stepped out of the car, it occurred to me that my flat coastal route I had so carefully and aggressively defended to my partner, was therefore shelterless and had the bonus of a full head wind...or gale.
As is my want I set off far too fast, without warming up and was beset with wardrobe failures. How is it that no matter how hard i try i can't keep the damn earphones in my ears? I must admit I looked mighty fine with my black beanie, fogged up glasses, footless tights, oversized shorts, comedy star wars parody t shirt, green fleece and red mackintosh. Ironically the mac is the one my partner won for his participation in the London Marathon. I did keep my head down, particularly when passing other fellow sportsman. The one time i did look up, the woman running passed looked exceedingly surprised, I don't blame her.
Anyway, I'm not going to give you a blow by blow account of my walk, it really wouldn't interest you, except to say that I was immeasurably pleased to reach my half way point which meant that I could turn around and be blown back along the way I came and that the odd supportive and rather piss-taking texts I did receive on route were very very welcome. I also had glorious fantasies of A and the kids surprising me in that car park at my finish line..... like I have ever done that for him.
What surprised me were the moments of sheer joy I experienced. I knew I enjoyed walking in the rain, especially with a cup of tea. One of my most favourite moments in my life is sitting under an open sided shelter on a black sand beach in Piha, New Zealand, in the pouring rain drinking a cup of tea, also fondly remember a moment of peace on my own in my friends back garden, again in the pouring rain with a cup of tea, having escaped the intensity of family life during early months with my baby first born girl.
I was literally in my element today.
Wind and rain blustering and belting down, finally having secured the ipod earphones in my ears with my friends Deacon Blue, Annie Lennox and James urging me to keep the beat. I belted out "Show me Heaven" whilst no one was in earshot and actually skipped at one point, not for long...nearly tripped.
Don't get me wrong, I really do not for the life of me know how I am going to manage 26 miles, at one point on the way home, I stopped to tie my shoe lace.... amazing how quickly you can cease up, but I had fun, achieved something and blew some cobwebs away.
Final highlight and classic Hattie, was totally oblivious to what direction I needed to go to get home I opted to follow a van, the driver of which seemed confident. In the manner of Dirk Gently, believing in the inter-connectedness of all things, I did not necessarily go the way i was supposed to, but I ended up where I needed to be. Or at least somewhere more interesting than where I was heading.
So am in training.... ha ha.
Finding it increasingly impossible to find the time to go walking regularly, i was pleased to have a whole Sunday morning time slot with which to do an 11 mile walk. I was less pleased to discover that my set time coincided with Gods schedule of heavy rain across the British Isles. Still, never one to let the weather get me down I was resolved to go anyway and planned my route along the coast.
Wishing my resolve had had the psychic foresight to predict a 2 night vomiting bug in my youngest, that would render me sleep impoverished, I set off anyway.
I soon realised at the beginning of my walk that I was an idiot. I do have a tendency to lack wisdom, most vitally when it comes to planning and general common sense. My usual half empty attitude seems to disappear in a surge of over optimistic confidence at the prospect of an adventure. As I stepped out of the car, it occurred to me that my flat coastal route I had so carefully and aggressively defended to my partner, was therefore shelterless and had the bonus of a full head wind...or gale.
As is my want I set off far too fast, without warming up and was beset with wardrobe failures. How is it that no matter how hard i try i can't keep the damn earphones in my ears? I must admit I looked mighty fine with my black beanie, fogged up glasses, footless tights, oversized shorts, comedy star wars parody t shirt, green fleece and red mackintosh. Ironically the mac is the one my partner won for his participation in the London Marathon. I did keep my head down, particularly when passing other fellow sportsman. The one time i did look up, the woman running passed looked exceedingly surprised, I don't blame her.
Anyway, I'm not going to give you a blow by blow account of my walk, it really wouldn't interest you, except to say that I was immeasurably pleased to reach my half way point which meant that I could turn around and be blown back along the way I came and that the odd supportive and rather piss-taking texts I did receive on route were very very welcome. I also had glorious fantasies of A and the kids surprising me in that car park at my finish line..... like I have ever done that for him.
What surprised me were the moments of sheer joy I experienced. I knew I enjoyed walking in the rain, especially with a cup of tea. One of my most favourite moments in my life is sitting under an open sided shelter on a black sand beach in Piha, New Zealand, in the pouring rain drinking a cup of tea, also fondly remember a moment of peace on my own in my friends back garden, again in the pouring rain with a cup of tea, having escaped the intensity of family life during early months with my baby first born girl.
I was literally in my element today.
Wind and rain blustering and belting down, finally having secured the ipod earphones in my ears with my friends Deacon Blue, Annie Lennox and James urging me to keep the beat. I belted out "Show me Heaven" whilst no one was in earshot and actually skipped at one point, not for long...nearly tripped.
Don't get me wrong, I really do not for the life of me know how I am going to manage 26 miles, at one point on the way home, I stopped to tie my shoe lace.... amazing how quickly you can cease up, but I had fun, achieved something and blew some cobwebs away.
Final highlight and classic Hattie, was totally oblivious to what direction I needed to go to get home I opted to follow a van, the driver of which seemed confident. In the manner of Dirk Gently, believing in the inter-connectedness of all things, I did not necessarily go the way i was supposed to, but I ended up where I needed to be. Or at least somewhere more interesting than where I was heading.
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